Stanley Okorie, a renowned composer and singer in Nollywood, has opened up about the reasons behind the breakdowns of his first two marriages.

In a candid conversation with media personality Chude Jideonwo, Okorie revealed that his first wife parted ways with him due to her dislike for his songs, which she deemed “stupid.” He also admitted his own shortcomings, describing himself as an insensitive husband.

Reflecting on his past, Okorie shared, “My first divorce was the hardest. You know, the first cut is the deepest. I take some responsibility for it. When people talk about issues in their marriages or relationships, they often focus on the other person’s faults. I’m not absolving myself entirely, but I know I was not a very sensitive husband. I blame myself for that.”

He continued, “I wasn’t attentive enough. Sometimes, if my wife got dressed up, I’d say, ‘I’m off to the studio, are you coming?’ No, that wasn’t considerate. I’d forget her birthday because I was immersed in my work [creating Nollywood soundtracks], and sometimes I’d get calls from London, they’d pay for my ticket, and I’d fly out to do the music. I thought providing financially was sufficient. But sometimes, the essence of love is presence. You can give money, but the foundation of love is being there.”

“Money wasn’t what my first wife wanted. Sometimes, I’d give her money, and later find it left on the table. I was deeply engrossed in my music, moving from one studio to another. Looking back, I see the cost of that. Everything comes with a cost. Economists call it opportunity cost. In my first marriage, I was terribly insensitive. If I had been more mature—admittedly, I married young—I would have understood why she felt neglected despite my hard work. I failed in that regard.”

“When she finally said, ‘I can’t do this anymore,’ I knew it was real, so I didn’t argue. Instead of trying to reconcile, I found solace in singing what I now consider silly songs to console myself.”

He also touched on his second divorce and the personal tragedies he faced. “At one point, my wife passed away. My son died. Some of the songs I composed were my escape from my sorrowful reality, helping me cope to some extent. But nothing compares to confronting your problems head-on. Music, in that sense, didn’t serve me well. I used it as an escape rather than facing my issues. Things that bring you joy today can later bring pain. So it’s been a mixed blessing. But I’m content now. I’m happily married with children, doing well, and still making music.”